Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
everyone is single if you try hard enough
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
