Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Randomize
