i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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