I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
