If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
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