This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
