I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
