But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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