uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
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