Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
