hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Randomize
