i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
