Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
