plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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