bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
