Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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