Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
