I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
