I want to walk on stilts...naked
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize