Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
