FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
i think my cat just said my name.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize