Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
