I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
