thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
My balls are so social today.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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