Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
