Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
