Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
