I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
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