You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
