in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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