So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
