Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize