I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
