They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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