She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
