im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Randomize
