How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
