I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize