u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
