just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
