Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
