census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize