I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Bring me that man meat
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
