I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
