Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize