The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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