OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
