margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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