ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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