oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
