I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize
