Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
So squirting runs in the family.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize